you need self control to be on this position
Before we talk about the limitations of self control, we should first understand the benefits of con...See more
Throughout our lives, there will be countless list of bad habits that we’ll need to overcome. For some of us, it could be quitting junk food. For others, it could be avoiding procrastination when you’re trying to learn a new skill. Here’s what research has found.
Researchers from University of Pennsylvania explored self-control in eighth-graders over the course of the school year. They gave students a task in which they had the option of receiving $1 immediately or waiting a week to receive $2.
What they found was interesting.
Students who decided to wait a week to receive $2 also had better attendance rates, test scores, and were more likely to attend better institutions. In other words, self control, was more important than IQ in academic success.
Another study was done by Duke University with a group of 1,000 individuals. 1 These individuals were were tracked from birth to age 32 as part of a long-term health study. They found that those with high self-control had fewer criminal records, higher income, and overall had greater physical and mental health.
What could explain this?
The theory is that self control is indeed limited. Those that resisted the baked goods were in a form of ‘stress.’ And by resisting one form of a stress, they were much more likely to succumb to another craving.
The bottom line is, instead of trying to simply increase self control, admit that it’s limited. Rather than trying to kick two bad habits at once, figure out what’s more important and tackle it one at a time.
Added: 1 year ago
The Secret Formula to a Perfect Life
We’re taught to work and study hard since our childhood for a better tomorrow, but I feel that it’s the time for me at least, to stop and reflect how it works and if it’s the right way to live. People around the globe, most of them, think it’s worth their while to work hard today for wealthy years of retirement in distant future. But is the ability to have fun received in the age when one can’t barely walk by himself is worth it? These people usually end up losing joyful stuff to only realize that good times aren’t ever materialized. I suggest everyone, to aim for the “unrealistic” things like traveling the world which will set you apart from people thinking “realistically” and settling for mediocrity Plus, with most people aiming for the good stuff, the great stuff is available for a lot less fierce competition. Unlike people who spend living away from their dreams, taking safe roads of hard work with an illusion of joyful retirement. This has to stop because the perfect moment as per the people who are successful as well as happy to live your dreams is NOW. This fantasy-like life is nowadays more easily possible which only one thing that everyone needs; an automatic income: a source of money that can be managed effortlessly from anywhere on the planet with along an income that you can earn while sleeping. The best examples are people in Photography, writing, music, art business who can create their works anywhere and share using our super technology to anywhere with earning while the stuff is being sold everywhere even when they are in their sleep. Living a true life, from my experience is doing stuff that may seem unworthy but is Fun, because we only live once, having hard conversations which are Important because they’ll set you free and Disregarding conventions that others stick to because doing so will make you different. Which way of living are you gonna choose? What do you want me to write about? Tell me in the comments. Don’t forget to like, share & subscribe for more stuff like this.
Why you are lonely ?
Psychologists Say This Effect Makes People Become Biased And Feel Lonely Have you ever felt like you were the only one to experience a certain thought, problem or emotion? Feeling this way can be extremely isolating, leading to loneliness and a bias towards negativity. However, just because you feel different to everyone else, it doesn’t mean that you are. Psychologists have concrete psychological evidence on how similar our hopes, dreams, and fears really are, and how we can use this information to feel happier, healthier, and more motivated. An identical personality description can apply to many people. In 1948, a psychologist named Bertram Forer told his students that he was going to present them each with an individualized sketch of their personality. What the students didn’t know was that each sketch was exactly the same. The sketch consisted of twelve points, which included the following:1 1.You have a great need for other people to like and admire you. 2.You have a tendency to be critical of yourself. 3.You have a great deal of unused capacity, which you have not turned to your advantage. 4.While you have some personality weaknesses, you are generally able to compensate for them. 5.Disciplined and self-controlled outside, you tend to be worrisome and insecure inside. Does this sound like you? If it does, you’re not alone. After presenting the personality sketch, Forer asked his students to rate it according to how well it applied to them. The average rating was 4.26 out of 5, with 5 being ‘excellent.’ This result demonstrates how similar we are to one another, with each student feeling that the twelve statements were uniquely applicable to them. While people may behave in ways that hide feelings like worry and insecurity, studies like this show that they affect everyone. By keeping this in mind, you’ll find it much easier to relate to others and form genuine connections. Most humans have very similar needs. In 1943, a psychologist named Abraham Maslow proposed a ‘hierarchy of needs,’ which represented a variety of human needs in the form of a pyramid.2 The idea of the pyramid is that in order to move to the next level, the needs of the level below must first be met. For example, before you’re able to fulfill the need for friendship, you must first fulfill basic needs like food and water. Helping others is important for everyone. While self-actualization was once considered the top of the pyramid, Maslow actually added another layer later in his life. This layer is labelled ‘self-transcendence,’ and refers to achieving altruistic goals, outside of the individual. This could involve charity work, helping others, or helping the environment. By remembering that we’re fundamentally very similar to other humans, it’s much easier to avoid feeling negative and lonely. Rather than focusing on the ways you feel different from others, try to direct your attention towards everything you have in common. You’ll feel happier, more motivated, and more connected to others.
You need self control
you need self control to be on this position You don’t need extremely high IQ to be successful, you need self-control. Before we talk about the limitations of self control, we should first understand the benefits of controlling oneself. Throughout our lives, there will be countless list of bad habits that we’ll need to overcome. For some of us, it could be quitting junk food. For others, it could be avoiding procrastination when you’re trying to learn a new skill. Here’s what research has found. Researchers from University of Pennsylvania explored self-control in eighth-graders over the course of the school year. They gave students a task in which they had the option of receiving $1 immediately or waiting a week to receive $2. What they found was interesting. Students who decided to wait a week to receive $2 also had better attendance rates, test scores, and were more likely to attend better institutions. In other words, self control, was more important than IQ in academic success. Another study was done by Duke University with a group of 1,000 individuals. 1 These individuals were were tracked from birth to age 32 as part of a long-term health study. They found that those with high self-control had fewer criminal records, higher income, and overall had greater physical and mental health. Self-control is limited. Try stick to one goal at a time. What could explain this? The theory is that self control is indeed limited. Those that resisted the baked goods were in a form of ‘stress.’ And by resisting one form of a stress, they were much more likely to succumb to another craving. The bottom line is, instead of trying to simply increase self control, admit that it’s limited. Rather than trying to kick two bad habits at once, figure out what’s more important and tackle it one at a time.
Do you know
Knowing Others Is Intelligence, Knowing Yourself Is True Wisdom Happily married people really know each other. A good mother knows her son. Astute teachers know their students. This knowledge is powerful. Insight into another human being provides the knower with a remarkable ability to meet needs, heal heartache, be emotionally supportive and above all, provide a prescripted and targeted kind of love. Often times, we find that we know the people we love better than we know ourselves. We are able to anticipate and fulfill their needs and desires without them even having to ask. However, when it comes to understanding and addressing our own needs we are lost. Getting to know you Getting to know yourself begins and ends with personal introspection. Understanding what makes you tick, what makes you happy or sad, discovering your fears and assessing how you truly feel about yourself is a journey requiring time, effort and courage. There are myriads of excellent self-assessment tools1 that can assist you in navigating the path of objectively assessing who you really are. The best thing you can do for others is to understand who you are and allow that to be the foundation for all of your interactions. Because the only thing you can do is interact with them based on who you are and not who they want you to be. You can teach them how to love and nurture the real you. The most positive thing you can do for yourself is to understand, accept and love who you truly are. Knowing yourself requires an honest, transparent and often times difficult dive into the depths of your soul. It is acceptance of all of your past experiences, acknowledgment of your weaknesses and then cherishing all of it. Get to know who you are—the good, the bad and the ugly.
How to cure Heart Breaks, according to Science?
You’ve just lost somebody who once played a major part in your life and now you have to get through the stages of grief to get over it. Getting over a breakup is never easy, and here’s why: During your relationship, your brain switches off the ability to judge and feel negatively about your partner. At the same time, it turns on the areas that cause you to bond with and feel attached to your partner. It’s hard to get over your ex because your brain causes you to idealize them.1 Dopamine, oxytocin, testosterone – these are all the chemicals your brain produces when you’re first falling in love. They’re responsible for those butterfly feelings, the need to cuddle, the rapid heart rate, and the excitement that come with a new relationship. Addicting feelings, to say the least. What happens when you break up? The ventral segment of your brain activates, which is the same thing that happens when someone is addicted to drugs. You are literally going through withdrawal over your ex. Breakups often happen suddenly, leaving you with little to no closure. It’s that feeling of unfinished business that makes it hard for you to get over your ex. You keep thinking about them because you were left with a void to fill, a hole to cover.You feel like there’s something left to understand about the situation and you just can’t shake the feeling. So now you’ve justified why it’s okay for you to keep thinking about your ex. You’re just going through the stages of grief, right? Your brain is tricking you into miss them, right? So, this is normal, right? Well, yes, sort of. You need to forget about your ex, though, so you can move on with your life. Somewhere out there is the right person for you and you don’t want thoughts of your ex-messing up your future relationship. In order to process the anger and disappointment that you’re feeling, you need to accept that one of the final stages of grief is to redirect your hope. For your entire relationship, you had all of your hopes tied up in your future together. Now, you have to find that hope again and redirect it. Try keeping yourself busy with new sources of entertainment. Maybe there’s an old hobby you let fall by the wayside when the two of you were dating or maybe there’s something you’ve always wanted to try. Now’s the time. Being busy keeps your mind off of the past and helps you redirect your thoughts to the future. Moving on after a relationship ends isn’t easy. Just try to be patient with yourself, the pain won’t last forever. You’ll get through this and learn more about yourself in the process.
The Science of Friend Zone
Friend zone refers to a situation where there is a mismatch of romantic feelings between two individuals. The key to any good relationships is the presence of mutually-satisfying social exchange. In the case of friend zone, as pointed by J eremy Nicholson in his Psychology Today article , some have entered into an exchange that is not fair or equal. "The other person is getting everything he/she wants...but the person stuck in the friend zone is not fully satisfied. In a nutshell, the friend zoned person sold himself or herself short. 1. Bateman's principle Bateman's principle is a concept in evolutionary biology which states that males are capable of producing millions of sperm cells with little effort, while females invest much higher levels of energy in order to nurture a relatively small number of eggs, due to which the female plays a significantly larger role in their offspring's reproductive success. Bateman's paradigm thus views females as the limiting factor of parental investment, over which males will compete in order to copulate successfully. Essentially, what Bateman pointed out was that women are very picky compared to men in choosing a mating partner because they invest much higher resources and energy in reproduction compared to men. 2. Assortative mating Now we have established the fact that it is females who make the call when it comes to picking a romantic partner. We should now look into the factors that influence one's decision in picking a mating or romantic partner. This is explained by something called assortative mating. Assortative mating is a mating pattern and a form of sexual selection in which individuals with similar phenotypes mate with one another more frequently than would be expected under a random mating pattern. In humans, assortative mating is based on genetic factors, socioeconomic status, racial or ethnic background and religious beliefs. 3. Matching Hypothesis The Matching Hypothesis developed by Elaine Hatfield in 1966 says that individuals who end up romantically linked to one another over time tend to match in their general level of desirable characteristics. Individuals who end up in good relationships often match each other in traits such as physical attractiveness, or education, or social status. Although there are exceptions, people tend to attract and mate with others who are similar to themselves, concludes the hypothesis. Why does one get friend zoned? One of the prominent reasons why people end up in the friend zone is that they are too afraid or passive to express their romantic interest. Many people approach someone they are attracted to as a friend since that carries less emotional risk. Essentially they are using friendship as a back channel for establishing a romantic relationship.