Thinking of sadists
What Sadists Are Actually Thinking And Why Nodoubt you saw this coming, the novel Fifty Shades of Gray by E.L. James has transformed and fetishized the sadomasochist dynamic. There has been a movement if you will of primarily women who wish to nurture their inner freak, ideally at the hands of a handsome and complicated billionaire. Ahh, Harley Quinn, the sexy and shall we say quirky super villain who is notorious for her obedience and devotion to the manipulative and sadistic Joker. In the film Suicide Squad, Harley literally throws herself into a vat of toxic waste to prove her undying commitment to her psychotically endearing counterpart. Although their relationship is clearly a case of cut and dry domestic abuse, there is something alluring about their compatibility. Stepping outside of the world of literature and fantasy, some of our beloved and renowned celebrities have a dark and sadomasochistic side of a sexual nature. Angelina Jolie is not bashful when it comes to disclosing intimate details about her sexual urges. Rhianna is another example, proclaiming her naughty side with lyrics such as, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and whips excite me.” But has sexiness in sadism been overrated these days?
Learn, how to Understand Yourself ?
You may be thinking that all of this is easier said than done. That’s understandable. We all have a certain amount of programming and bad habits in our brains that can sometimes make change difficult. But we are nothing if not flexible. There are several things you can start doing right now that will help you to understand yourself and maybe even enjoy your own company. Go on quiet walks on your own in nature. Nature puts us in tune with our mind and body and relieves depression. Enjoying nature for a little while every day can help you feel more content in being alone with yourself . Journal. Don’t worry about whether or not you’re a good writer. In fact, don’t worry about what you’re writing about at all. Use the “stream of consciousness” technique.Journaling can be a great way to vent and relieve tension and can help you reach a better understanding of your own mind. You needn’t devote much time to this activity unless it feels right. Five to ten minutes should suffice. Use art of any kind. Whether it’s music, painting, or just coloring, art is an invaluable tool to help you connect with your deeper self in a more meaningful level. Many people use coloring to put their mind into a meditative or calm state when traditional meditation doesn’t work for them. Meditate. Meditating is probably one of the most tried and true methods to help you gain a deeper understanding and love for yourself. Just remember if it’s your first time, not to be discouraged if you can’t completely relax into a meditation. The key to a happy life isn’t a happy relationship. The trick is to realize that you’re beautiful, wonderful, and whole all by yourself. Take some time to get to know the wonderful being that is you. The only side effects are increased happiness and health!
Don't hesitate to do silly things
The More We Allow Ourselves To Do Silly Things, The More Confident We Become How should a confident person be like? Someone who does everything well, believes in his competence, and has pride in his achievements? Or someone who does stupid things occasionally in front of others? The former description might seem to fit the typical definition of confident people. Innumerable articles and discussions tell us that to be more confident, we need to remind ourselves of what we have achieved whenever we doubt ourselves. But what if the answer is the other way round? In fact, the ones who are more willing to accept their idiocies are more confident. Some people are not really that confident. We are conscious of our competence and achievements because they are probably the only solid things in our lives to prove our abilities and strengths. We say Usain Bolt is an excellent sprinter not just because he is physically strong but because he has the ability to break world records. The recognition and pride that come from within are our sources of confidence. But in the long term, if we will care too much about our dignity and overestimate our importance, we will easily avoid situations that threaten them. Let’s say if Bolt were someone who cared much about his dignity, it is very likely that he would refuse when someone invited him to participate in any competition as he would fear that failure would damage his image as a great runner. Confidence built upon our competence achievements might not be something that we should look for. Accept our stupidity is the way to build true confidence. Make fun of yourself! Allowing yourself to make mistakes and laugh at yourself afterwards is the key to build your confidence. If you are a lost tourist, you can embrace your innocence and kindly ask for direction despite the fact that people might regard you with contempt. But it’s totally fine. You can simply laugh at yourself for not getting well-prepared for your trip. When you laugh at yourself more often, you will realize that you don’t need to be perfect to be accepted. We can do nothing about our stupidity as it is an inborn quality of the human race. How great it is to know that even the greatest people are as stupid as we are! The true confidence we have will allow us to give things a go and accept whatever happens to us.
Relation mistakes we always made
We’ve all been there before, head over heels in love and sure our partner is “the one”. We spend every waking moment together and dream about what the future will bring. We’re sure this is the deepest love we’ve ever felt. And then the day comes when the relationship doesn’t work out. Those breakups can be the most painful and often leave us asking ourselves, “what happened?” When you’re young, it can be easy to commit the biggest relationship mistake in the dating world: Thinking love is enough to sustain a relationship. Patty Smyth had it right when she sang, “Baby, sometimes love just ain’t enough.” But don’t worry. You’re not alone. Everybody experiences this relationship mistake at one time or another. It’s all part of learning more about ourselves. How to Avoid the Biggest Relationship Mistake Maybe you’re thinking, how can the biggest relationship mistake be thinking that love is enough? What more could a relationship possibly need? The answer is: plenty. When you rely on love alone to sustain your relationship, it can be easy to forget about some other very important factors. But don’t worry, we’re going to take a look at just what’s missing from these relationships. 1.Trust 2.Understanding 3.Respect 4.Communication 5.Be Able to Spend Time Apart 6.Support
Personal values matter
What’s important to you? Your morning coffee? Making time to walk your dog? Getting that assignment to your boss on time? Okay, but what’s valuable to you? According to Atlantic Magazine, 7 out of 10 Americans say people’s values have been getting worse in America over the past decade.1 What are your personal values? What Are Values? Your values are a testament to your true self, because they are what matter most to you when it comes to personal and professional life. Your values influence that little voice in your head that tells you whether or not to care about something, and how you should prioritize your time. What Should I Do With My Core Values? Just sit down and make a list of what comes to mind, and let yourself explore those core values words. There is no set limit on how many values you can have, but allow yourself to list as many as you can.
Psychologists Say This Effect Makes People Become Biased And Feel Lonely Have you ever felt like you were the only one to experience a certain thought, problem or emotion? Feeling this way can be extremely isolating, leading to loneliness and a bias towards negativity. However, just because you feel different to everyone else, it doesn’t mean that you are. Psychologists have concrete psychological evidence on how similar our hopes, dreams, and fears really are, and how we can use this information to feel happier, healthier, and more motivated. An identical personality description can apply to many people. In 1948, a psychologist named Bertram Forer told his students that he was going to present them each with an individualized sketch of their personality. What the students didn’t know was that each sketch was exactly the same. The sketch consisted of twelve points, which included the following:1 1.You have a great need for other people to like and admire you. 2.You have a tendency to be critical of yourself. 3.You have a great deal of unused capacity, which you have not turned to your advantage. 4.While you have some personality weaknesses, you are generally able to compensate for them. 5.Disciplined and self-controlled outside, you tend to be worrisome and insecure inside. Does this sound like you? If it does, you’re not alone. After presenting the personality sketch, Forer asked his students to rate it according to how well it applied to them. The average rating was 4.26 out of 5, with 5 being ‘excellent.’ This result demonstrates how similar we are to one another, with each student feeling that the twelve statements were uniquely applicable to them. While people may behave in ways that hide feelings like worry and insecurity, studies like this show that they affect everyone. By keeping this in mind, you’ll find it much easier to relate to others and form genuine connections. Most humans have very similar needs. In 1943, a psychologist named Abraham Maslow proposed a ‘hierarchy of needs,’ which represented a variety of human needs in the form of a pyramid.2 The idea of the pyramid is that in order to move to the next level, the needs of the level below must first be met. For example, before you’re able to fulfill the need for friendship, you must first fulfill basic needs like food and water. Helping others is important for everyone. While self-actualization was once considered the top of the pyramid, Maslow actually added another layer later in his life. This layer is labelled ‘self-transcendence,’ and refers to achieving altruistic goals, outside of the individual. This could involve charity work, helping others, or helping the environment. By remembering that we’re fundamentally very similar to other humans, it’s much easier to avoid feeling negative and lonely. Rather than focusing on the ways you feel different from others, try to direct your attention towards everything you have in common. You’ll feel happier, more motivated, and more connected to others.